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Reviews· 1-2-3 Magic· Surviving Your Adolescents· Self-Esteem Revolutions in Children· All About ADD
If your child has begun to rule the roost a bit more than you'd like, this book provides a system to get your family operating smoothly. Especially sensible is Phelan's theory that children shouldn't be argued with endlessly to convince them to do what you want them to do. He also wisely points out the best way to get your child to repeat unwanted behavior is to have a highly emotional reaction to it. The plan is simple, and though it's not quite magic, it may feel like it is. This system is easy to learn, it's clear to both adults and children, and it's easy to use. And folks, guess what? IT works!
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., L.A. Parent Magazine
This newly revised second edition provides a fine coverage of effective discipline choices to be used on children ages 2-12. From handling sibling rivalry and arguing to avoiding self-defeating syndromes and reactions, this covers everything from home to public behavior, providing parents with plenty of solid tips which work. More 1-2-3 Magic is highly recommended for parents dedicated to encouraging their child's good behavior within a loving family oriented context.
Midwest Book Review
Dr. Phelan's methods have been proven by hundreds of thousands of children over the years...consider this and Phelan's earlier titles must buys. Highly recommended. Editor's Choice.
Video Librarian
Previously available as a booklet in conjunction with a workshop and as a video, clinical psychologist Phelan's simple, effective child-management program has now been issued as a trade paperback. The gist of the plan is to enable parents to discipline children, ages 2 to 12, by instituting a system of counting and time-outs, delivered straightforwardly and unemotionally. How the regimen is used to stop undesirable behavior, stimulate desirable conduct, and cope with children's testing is conveyed in Phelan's candid style, filled with common sense, concrete examples, and lots of reassuring humor. Time-and parent-tested, the methods are applied in identifiable situations (pouting, bedtime, dressing) as well in the all-too familiar incidences of children testing and manipulating their elders. Best of all, the method enables parents to control their kids without yelling -- or worse. In addition, Phelan covers homework, active listening, self-esteem, behavior in public, and the use of his method in schools. An excellent, workable, and supportive resource for parents and educators.
Irene Wood, Booklist, American Library Association
...Parents have found that even the most unmanageable children aged two through twelve respond "like magic" to psychologist, parent and nationally known child discipline authority Dr. Thomas W. Phelan's simple "1-2-3" method.
American Airlines' Sybervision Catalog
Every parent quickly realizes that children don't come with a training manual. Learning to address their children's difficult behavior while encouraging good behavior is not an easy task. More than we care to admit, a child's tantrums, pouting, badgering or disrespect makes a parent fall into the Talk-Persuade-Argue-Yell-Hit syndrome. The author, Dr. Thomas W. Phelan, a nationally renowned lecturer on child discipline, thinks this breakdown is due, for the most part, to parents assuming incorrectly that their children are "little adults". Parents are under the misconception that if they explain things in a reasonable manner, their children will see the logic and do what they are requested to do. Unfortunately, children are not "little adults". Children do not always respond to reason and therefore parents need a "no talk", "no emotion" plan of action. With over twenty-five years of experience, working with thousands of parents around the country, Dr. Phelan developed 1-2-3 Magic to help parents regain control. This new edition reflects refinements developed over the years, plus four brand new chapters for teachers, covering preschool to junior high and is designed to give parents and teachers hope. 1-2-3 Magic is not really magic although it may seem that way. The book and the video outline some very simple, precise and effective ways to manage any child from the age 2 to 12. Covering just about every common, everyday problem situation that a parent might encounter, you, the parents, can learn exactly what to do, what not to do, what to say and what not to say. Switching from talking to counting, the basis of the program, establishes with a child that they are out of line and, more importantly, they are responsible for their own behavior. The 1-2-3 method leaves no doubt who's in charge and it can be easily understood by children of almost any age. In addition to the counting method, the book also addresses sibling rivalry and explains how to control start and stop behavior, misbehavior in public and how to respond to a child's attempt to test and manipulate their parents. Parents are given the tools to re-establish their authority and also gain confidence as well. This may be helpful for you to ensure a more peaceful home or classroom, more enjoyable kids with better self-esteem. (From the Exceptional Parent Library Millennium Catalog, by Ron Richards, 2000, Oradell, NJ. Exceptional Parent Magazine Copyright 2000 by Psy ed Corp D/B/A Exceptional Parent Magazine. Reprinted with permission.)
Ron Richards, Exceptional Parent Library
As an educator, I looked forward to reading another book about positive (assertive) discipline, but I must say that the parent in me was astounded at the content in 1-2-3 Magic. This book is right on target with the events that happen in my house on an every day basis, and in those of my friends, family and neighbors. The author presents the concept of reinforcing positive behavior with his "catch them being good" approach, offering basic tools for disciplining negative behavior. Dr. Phelan does this in a simple, common-sense, don't-give-them-an-inch manner and...IT WORKS! I recommend 123 Magic for anyone teaching or raising a child, from toddler to teenager. Not only does it work, but it is so simple to understand, and you'll find yourself wondering why you didn't start using the approach sooner.
Debbie Williams, Editor, Organized Times
...Marti Yonikus, head social worker for Naperville (IL) District 203, says elementary teachers in the district have started using the program to establish order in the classroom...A lot of schools are using it...Yonikus also uses the program with her three children.
Daily Herald
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Surviving Your Adolescents, Thomas W. Phelan, Ph.D. The subtitle for this publication is "How to Manage and Let Go Of Your 13-18 Year Olds." This book is so practical you can read a chapter and walk into the next room and put it into practice. It begins with a chapter on straight-thinking, then moves to one on sorting out the serious from the"minor but aggravating" actions. Other sections describe parent roles, how to manage specific problems and one entitled, "No teenager will thank you." This is a positive, easy-to-read guide.
Vivian J. Nimmo, Editor, Valley Kids Parent News
Surviving Your Adolescents, which is based on the best-selling book by author Thomas W. Phelan, Ph.D., zeroes right in on teenagers. A filmed version of Dr. Phelan's parenting workshop, this sequel to 1-2-3 Magic -- his parenting program for parents of children aged 2-12 -- aims to help parents learn to enjoy their teenagers, protect teens while helping them gain their independence, and lay the groundwork for a healthy future relationship. Phelan's lecture, accompanied by film clips of good and bad examples, starts off by introducing the audience to characteristics of normal teen behavior he calls MBA's (minor but aggravating), and outlining the physical and emotional changes taking place, before moving on to serious problems and risks facing teens today. Dr. Phelan sports some impressive credentials, including those from the school of hard knocks; the father of two teenagers, one with ADD, Phelan opts for a practical, down-to-earth approach to parenting, encouraging parents to establish boundaries, keep the lines of communication open, treat their children with respect and be a good listener. An engaging, humorous speaker, Phelan thoroughly covers all facets of parenting teens in a positive and upbeat manner, without belittling adolescents or talking down to adults. Ultimately, this well produced video would be helpful not only for parents but for anyone who works with teens on a regular basis as well. Highly recommended.
Lori Stevens - Video Librarian
Surviving Your Adolescents: How To Manage And Let Go Of Your 13-18 Year Olds gives a step-by-step approach that will help end hassles and offer concrete solutions. In its pages readers will learn the differences between teens and parents, how to evaluate the seriousness of their problems, exactly what problems require professional attention, what problems require "letting go", the Four Cardinal Sins (what not to do!), five ways to improve the parent-teen relationship, what role to take (Observer, Advisor, Negotiator, Director), tactics to combat testing and manipulation, and guidelines for common specific problems. Concise and encouraging, Surviving Your Adolescents does not assume that parents of teens have infinite amounts of time, energy or patience. Thomas Phelan's message is clear: parents are neither alone nor powerless. With Surviving Your Adolescents, the parents can survive their adolescents. Articulate, practical, innovative, and filled with specific "things to do", Surviving Your Adolescents is a terrific addition to all "how-to" parenting bookshelves.
Midwest Book Review
Dr. Thomas W. Phelan shares his personal and professional expertise in this newest guide for parents, entitled Surviving Your Adolescents: How To Manage And Let Go Of Your 13-18 Year Olds. Whether your child is average, angelic, or has ADD, these child management techniques will prove invaluable. Phelan explains when doing nothing is the best strategy, how to set up appointments to discuss problematic behavior, and when taking charge is the only alternative. He hands control back to parents by defining potentially explosive situations with clarity and by suggesting strategies to be mapped out before an incident occurs. To bolster his advice, he outlines specific problem situations complete with right and wrong parental action. A great resource, terse and energizing.
Denise Perry Donavin, Booklist, American Library Association
"With his trademark practicality and humor, Dr. Phelan provides parents with empowering nut-and-bolts guidance."
Irene Wood, L.A. Parent Magazine
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In Self-Esteem Revolutions In Children Thomas Phelan describes "self-esteem revolutions" as the sweeping changes that youngsters experience in the foundations of self-respect as they mature. These "revolutions" include the transition from self-esteem based simply on unconditional parental love to self-esteem that is based on the conditional acceptance of other people, as well as based on competence. Another motivator with children is the development of "Great Evaluator" inside each child, which constantly gives feedback about how well youngsters are doing in the social, academic, physical and character dimensions of their lives. Self-Esteem Revolutions In Children is essential reading for any parent, teacher, or care-giver.
Midwest Book Review
Finally, a book that puts substance into the much-misused notion of self-esteem. Dr. Phelan offers parents sound advice in helping children develop a positive sense of self.
William Damon, author of Greater Expectations
Naturally, parents want their children to grow up with a robust, yet realistic self-respect but how? In their eagerness to help, parents often use tactics which make them feel better without actually advancing their childrens self-esteem. In this enlightening book, Dr. Phelan offers easily understood and achievable methods to help children gain self-respect.
Ingram
Dr. Phelan cuts Straight to the heart of the matter and gives parents concrete and practical tips on how to enhance childrens self esteem
Karen Owens, author of Raising Your Childs Inner Self-Esteem
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Plain speaking from years of personal and professional experience this lucid resource can help individuals of all ages a must .
American Librarian Association
Dr. Phelan is an accomplished lecturer and his comments concerning ADD are both perceptive and informed this two video set will be very popular. Highly Recommended.
Video Librarian
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